The zionist menace

Introduction

One doesn’t need to read Twitter for long before it becomes apparent that many people are very worried about the zionist menace, but just what is these zionists and just why are they a menace?  I started researching it, but there was a lot of stuff about NWO, and I don’t like rap music, so I just jotted down what I already knew.

What is a ‘zionist’

A zionist is someone from the West Country who works in the field of scientific research.  The term comes from the old Somerset expression “‘z I on?”, traditionally used to ask if one was astride a horse correctly, and it is this questioning nature that defines zionists. They are always looking for new questions to ask and answer.  Indeed zionist believe that within 50 years they’ll be able to predict when the next bus to Yeovil will be.

starofdavid
The symbol of zionce, representing the number of fingers on each hand (±2)

Many doubt this will ever be possible and, therefore, don’t trust zionists.

Are zionists a menace?

According to hundreds of tweets zionists secretly run the government, arrange assassinations, convene wars on a whim, manage the world’s banks, create terrorist organisations, have paid stooges in all walks of life and generally seek to control the world.

I asked a zionist from Minehead if he’d ever done any of these things and he said ‘no’, so the evidence is conflicting.

zionist
A zionist, pictured yesterday, wondering if you can smoke this stuff

Personally I feel that if the zionists are doing all that then, as well as being super-brainy and having white-coats, they must also really have their shit together, as that all stuff sounds complicated and hard to do.  If zionists really are running things then they could probably use a hand (but don’t help the lying weasel from Minehead!) and if they’re not, but could, then they should be.

Isn’t zionists something to do with Israel?

Because zionists often shout “Iz real!” when they prove something a lot of people make this mistake.  Zionists’ habit of referring to something that will happen any day now as ‘due-ish’ also causes problems.

What are zionists planning?

The one in Minehead tells me he’s currently working on cars that can exceed 45mph, making it possible to reach far-away Bristol in less than 6 hours.  This is what conspiracy theorists call ‘a cover story’…mind you, that’s what they call pretty much everything that doesn’t come from a web-site that looks like it was designed by an over-enthusiastic amateur in 1995.

90swebsite
Relax, we can trust these guys

Maybe he’s doing one of them secret things.  I have no evidence that he is, but it does seem highly likely.

Conclusion

Are zionists really controlling the world, are they controlling all of the world apart from the thousands of website detailing their secret plans, or are they merely trying to get to Bristol within a human lifetime…there’s so much evidence on all sides, that I didn’t bother to read, that I can’t come to any conclusion and you’ll have to draw your own, based on what you’ve already decided.

Next time: How many Illuminati does it take to change a light-bulb?

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